pretty cool stuff
I have to agree with some of what the guys below me said about this. Let me start with the good parts though:
I liked your art style, i think it fits well with the kind of dark, melancholy atmosphere. i like how you draw the characters very realistically, thats something thats really missing on a lot of flash animations I've seen on Newgrounds. its like artists these days are either too lazy or don't have the skill to draw realistic characters so props for that. i liked the sketchiness of it too because i think it also fits with the type of atmosphere that you're trying to portray.
however i don't think the animation does the art style justice. if you're gonna make such a realistic movie, then the animation has to be pretty smooth. the part in the beginning where that guy with glowing eyes was walking towards the girl was kind of messed up. it was like he was just sliding from side to side instead of actually jerking from side to side.
also, the weakest thing about all this was the script and the voice acting. i really don't know which was more poor. the script either sounded out of place, too cheesy or it was forced like when she said that line about not fearing death but being afraid of life. the voice acting was pretty bad, especially for that black guy lol why don't you try actually getting a black guy to do the voice acting? and was the blonde guy supposed to have an English accent?
if you can improve on the script, the voice acting, and the fluidity of the animation this could be much much better.